Sunday, May 22, 2011

Day 213

I'm curious what type of psychological diagnosis I might have. 

I understand that's quite a way to start today's comments, so let me start at the end of the story.  At the first glance of today's self-portrait, there is an obvious change in my appearance: the beard is gone. 

Now, let me say for the sake of clarity, that I generally prefer myself with some sort of facial hair.  Unfortunately, however, I find myself literally unable to leave my whiskers alone, especially when they get a little longer.  I constantly catch myself reaching up and touching them.  I bite on the ones near my mouth.  I pluck errant hairs when I catch my reflection in the mirror (and not just the grays, either!).  The worst of all?  When they get long enough to grab with my teeth, I pull them out - yes, with my teeth! 

(To answer the obvious question: yes, it hurts.)

When I was a small kid, my mom got very worried about me because I started to lose patches of hair.  Fearing some sort of dreadful disease, she hauled me off to the doctor for a diagnosis.  She found his first suggestion to be ludicrous: perhaps I was pulling it out on my own.  But I couldn't be that goofy, right?!

Wrong.  Soon, Mom found some clothespins hidden away with some of my hairs stuck in the spring mechanism.  Yes . . . apparently I was pulling out clumps of my hair.  Although I don't remember this happening, I would assume that it hurt then as well!  Recently I asked a psychological professional what could've been my motivation for doing something so strange at the time, and she replied that it was likely caused by some sort of anxiety I had at the time.  Hmmm, it makes me wonder.

Back to present day.  I won't say that I shaved the beard solely because I was tired of messing with my whiskers.  I've stated before that I really love changing my appearance on a regular basis, so this was just one of those times.  But, I have also readily admitted to having some pretty strange proclivities, and this was certainly one of them.  Either way, it won't be a distraction - at least until I grow it back again! 

#213 May 21, 2011,  Pencil

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